Hey alllll . 

School's starting in less than 2 months time and I'm currently training myself to stay awake after work till 10pm.
Always feeling sleepy at 7-8pm and that's bad.

Nothing much interesting in life now except work work work.
Patients flow to clinic is crazy as usual, we all are working like dogs with not enough manpower and extended working hours.
Soo soo soo tiring. 

Can't wait to change my phone cos my sony keep on crashing.
Home system, apps, insufficient phone memory space though I'd already deleted most unnecessary.
Goodness, am aiming for an iphone5 hopefully there's stocks!
13october onwards ~~ 


Sidenote, 7 months with baby (: 
Really feeling very blessed to meet and be with this boy. 
I've never ever love any guy that much before (: (: (: 

X, 

Hey hooooo, 

I nearly forgot my user & password for my dear blog but thanks to weebly support group! 
If not I'll be damn sad sia :( 
Anyway, here are the past months updates with pictures!

Vain vain vain.
I took out my stud one month back I guess, 
It's left with a small dimple which I am satisfied with (: Hehe! 

Look at mah boy's superrrrrrr cute face please (: (: 

Celebrated my Big 2 (21st!) at park avenue clementeau 2D1N with my sec school friends and poly cliques(: 
Thanks many many for those that came down earlier to help, those that came for the celebration and also those that wished me HB! 

Special thanks to eve bestf, mel bf, ginger, sisele, ray, ly and mich :D
They helped me with decorations w/o any complaints at all, helped me entertain the guests. Mich helped me to braid my hair somemore. I feel so xinfu lor :$ 

I enjoyed myself alot! 
Ordered strawberry icecream choco cake from marble slab,
Buffet (quantity too much) and the place is so spacious and beautiful!!

I am blessed with many many polaroids (100+) and well hand written wishes <3 <3 

One of the many meetups with friends,
This was with mich and ly for korean bbq (: 
Om nom!!! 

Went to gardens by the bay, flower dome & cloud forest 
With bfy, sis and ray! 
Cos bro won tickets, we only have to pay 10$ each for the 4 of us (:
It was pretty evening soon by the time we reach there, and didnt really get to see the whole view of everything,
But the night view is still magnificent (: 

Went for bowling after that! 
Long time since I bowled. At least Im better than my sis HEHE :P 
The boys keep strike and spare. tsktsktsk 

I guess that's all for now. 
Current updates : 
Work and work and work, place is more busy now at new medical centre and it's non stop working from start time to end time :( 

Boy's at camp confinment for 2 weeks 3 days, now left 10 more days to book out!
I can't wait :( Miss him superrrrrrrrrrr alot, I broke down yesterday huhu :( 
Normally cannot even tahan 1 day of not whatsapping each other non stop morning to night (max 4 days of not seeing him) ,
Now the most is only phone call at night :((

Can't waittttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt. 
Gonna rape him when I see him *smirky* 

Till then,
X 

Hey all,
Updates for the past two months: 

- Graduated from Republic Polytechnic! Hehehe finally! (: 
Was mentioned during the graduation ceremony for my contribution and achievement for my FYP. 
But also no award. Tsktsktsk anyway. 

Dad, bro, sis and ray came over to attend thankyou! (: 

- Went for cheek piercing together with YT! 
It's 1 month now, still having pus but it cured earlier. 
I blame it on the haze seriously! Making my face condition to worsen as well. 

- 4th month with the boy! (: 

- Learnt how to operate more machines and still working happily at my current workplace. Although some patients really fucking tak boleh tahan. 
Quarreled with this patient in front of the whole clinic and despite me apologizing she felt that I wasn't sincere like wtf. 
And told my in charge that I should attend some anger management course. Oh please, dealing with such knn patient like you and even saying sorry is just fucking wasting my breath. Tsk. 
L.L.M.H. I still fucking remember your full name. You will come to no good end. Knn 

- Obviously there are nice patients as well. 
Those that you can chat with and even give you tips for your future. So cute, thank you Mr Yeo (: 

That's all for now
Bye ! 

Not feeling that good these few weeks.

Whenever i complain, and brood over whatever's affecting me, i will sub-consciously blame it back on myself. 
Lost too much tears and hurt too much self feelings.

Sigh. 

What's so good being 21? An adult? 
Recently up tight with money issues, it's driving me really up the wall.

I don't want to rely on anybody, to help me in my finances for degree studies. 
$5.3K for first installment and i have to pay them by 2nd may. 
Even if i work, i will not have enough by the end of the month. 
I was so fucking stressed, and fucking afraid to ask dad to lend me. 

Because for poly days, asking him 2K for poly fees already kena. 
And it's so unfair because I used my psea to pay my poly fees for the other sems and did not even use his cpf. And bro and sis loan from him and i didnt even.
It was so bad, i cried so badly. Now it's 5K. Imagine. Just fucking imagine.
Why is it so unfair? Other kids out there can study in peace without any worries for school fees. And I was only 18 when i have to start worrying about money issues. Money for food when dad forgot to give allowance, money for school fees, money for necessity. Why?

Bank loan isnt a solution either. Because it requires time. 
And a grantor. Alongside with the accumulative interest. And the following installments when school starts. I will fucking be forever in debts. It is not a small sum. And it's driving me mad.

Final solution, I asked bro. Really thankful of him being willing to lend me the money.
But he really hurt my feelings. Asking for email verification as if I am conning him or whatsoever. Showing whatever attitude and suggesting me to pay 1K per month when i get my pay. 
I'm your sister. It's not as if i will run anywhere. Not any further even if i want to. When i say i will return, i will. 
When i was so fucking pissed and depressed, he then say i can take my time to pay. If i can hold 10 jobs in a month, to pay you off asap, i swear i will. Even if i turn into a zombie. 

Job starting soon and I was notified i must wear formal wear for work. And i only have one set. And $100 left for the month of may.
I'm so fucking sian and headache now. 

I know that these things will be over soon as long as it get settled one by one. But it's really taking a troll of me. 

I think im pushing people away again. I don't know. I rather them be unaware of what i'm going through and stay cheerful, than me affecting their moods with my problems. 
Maybe it's just me, if i were to suffer, i would rather suffer alone. 
So, i shall just shutup. As usual. 

X, 

Hey all 

• Job interview with NUH a success! (: 
  Ophthalmic technician, 5days a week, $1.8K plus cpf
  Cpf last warning sia, take home pay in the end only $1.4+ :(
  Anyway waiting for medical report to be out now,
  If everything is fine most prolly starting work on 2nd may!
  
  And crazy jsie wnna work 2 jobs for this 7 months
  At home also nothing to do anyway.
  
  
• Met up with boyf after interview for lunch at dintaifung.
  This sillyboy woke up early attempting to meet me at NUH straight but fell back asleep. Still very sweet of him for the attempt :$ 
  Thankyou <3 
  
  Ytd met up with piggieboy too (: 
  Wanted to go food for thought @ botanic garden but sudden change of plans. Overall day was great too although it was impromptu. Hehehe 
  
  
• Went to batam 2D1N with huisin, cindi and jen. 
  Overall not a bad trip experience but abit angsty may be because I am not THAT close to the company. 
  Trip tour : traditional batam dance, birdnest factory, kueh lapis, chocolate factory, dried goods, buffet lunch, body massage, ralph lauren factory outlet, check in at BCC hotel.
  
  Free time we went for shopping at nagoya shopping centre, BSC shopping centre and street food which was epic! Indo go by ordering food based on the amount of rupiah you are able to pay, so we wanted 15 sticks of satay. The person thought is 15rp. 
  Served us one plate of 15rp satay - 10sticks + rice.
  Then we wanted more rice, and the person thought 1 plate each. Ended up each of us had to eat 15rp of satay! 
  But food was cheap and good, had cockles, kangkong, lemon chicken and one more plate of vege, total only SGD $8 each (:

That's all 
X, 

 

Hey, 

• Went for free ben&jerry cone day with bfy, SN, yun at rochester followed by slacking at cityhall and MBS with mimi and yt. 
  First time for me to participate in this cone day event and getting one within ~20minutes because we went before the school crowd arrives! (Y) 
  Not a pleasant day to sum up but whatever. Links to previous post. 
  
  
• Met up with bfy for dinner at causeway point, empire state. First time trying and chose pizza cos having cravings! But wont go for attempt #2 because the terriyaki pizza tastes similar to pork floss bun in breadtalk!
  Not to my liking. Slack till 11+ then home (: 
  
  
• The following day supposingly meeting Y2S2 clique for dinner + drink but last minute plan just screwed up. 
  Ended up meet up with bfy to newton circus food center for nommies! Food was good and company was great. Thanks boy for making this day end up well and being a great tour guide :D
  Love exploring new places and trying new stuffs with this guy!  
  
  
• Met up with elesis and bro to 313 for dinner and aldo shopping. Planned to buy daddy's present but time was quite crucial! Nonetheless appreciate the company and i love the times whereby we 3 will hang out just like this. 
  
  
• Few days back I dreamt about someone telling me, [if you miss someone, you can lean on their shoulders]. 
  In my dream, i thought of mummy. I cried, and i woke up. In the real life, i was crying too. 
  It was such a sad feeling, and i still cant believe it'd been 2 years since it happened. Really misses mummy very very much, everytime just thinking of her just makes tears flow down so easily, it seemed so effortless </3 :( 
  
  
• Going for ophthalmology (eye) technician interview at NUH tomorrow. God bless!! Researching and read up on the eye disorders and tests carried out now! 
  First time preparing myself for an interview!! 
  
  
• Side note, yes approval to MDIS for november intake (: 

The people that came into my life, helping me throughout and ensuring that I stay happy, I'm really thankful to you. 
I don't care if it's part of your job, or just you being yourself, you'd really made a difference in my life, and I'm appreciative. 
Thankyou. (: (: (: 
I know it's hard for me to say I'm 100% happy every day, because part of me will still be myself, part of me will still be greedy and want the past, where most of my loved ones are still around. But I'm really much more happier than those times when it last happened. 


That's all I guess. 
X

I hate those situations.
You know, when you are put in a spot between your friends and your bfy. 

If it was the previous me, I would definitely put friends first.
I'm not saying like my previous bfys arent of any equal importance. 
But I'm more of a person whereby I rather my friends to not feel left out, as compared to my bfy.
Because I understand how it feels like to have your friend only entertaining their other half and you're sitting there like an idiot. 
I hate that feeling.
Unless you're with other bunch of friends and your friend can talk to them. Then it won't be much of an issue already. 

And I expect my bfy to understand that I will accompany my friend more when we are together with other friends. 
They do, but on the other hand I'd probably hurt them somehow (I guess) because it shows that friends are more important to me in a way. 
It has became an issue too in my previous relationship. 

But you know what? Whenever I accompany that friend/ friends whenever it is in those situations, the end result when that friend has their other half, things are never vice versa.
Their other half is of more importance to you instead. 
Laugh, so silly of me. 

I've learnt. 
And sad to say, I really prioritize my current bfy so much more than friends now. 
Of cos, I would strike a balance if I can. 
But if I have to make a choice, I would put my bfy first before anyone already. Especially those that I had wrong judgements about. 

And that jejune you, since you are with other friends of ours and you said that I and bfy are spending couple moments together instead of interacting with you all,
I make the effort to organise the outing indirectly for you
You were late, you were not fucking appreciative at all, 
I don't care if you're jealous or what, but hello, 
When I and bfy tried to talk to you all, we were ignored. Knnbpcb, then might as well we talk to each other instead?

And please, we did not PDA or whatever shit.
Just fucking hold hands. You got a problem with that? 
How is that spending couple moments? I don't get it. 

So fucking fucking angry with you. 
Dumbest decision ever to invite you back into the group. 
Tsk. 

Angsty jessie. 
Kbye. 

Hey, 

• Boyf came back from taiwan already (: and gave me many many goodies! Thanks boy! 
  Went to RP to collect biopharma cert with SN and boyf and lunch with jer faci! Nom nom! Was a short but nice meetup!
  After that planned to have prata with boyf near adm and he'll be the tour guide for the day! But because had lunch with faci earlier on so plan was postponed! 
  
  Proceeded to serangoon for prata instead followed by dessert at chompchomp dessertbowl :D waffles with ice cream! 
  
  
• Temporary 3 day job with liyin, mich and syham to help SIM graduates wear their gowns. $8/hour!
  A rather interesting and enjoyable job cos can chat with the graduates (most are friendly) and is own time own target!
  
  To know that you had helped one indirectly by presenting themselves well on their big day, it's really a special feeling to have (: 
  
  
• Met up with boyf after last day of temp job for lunch (: 
  Met at clementi and we wanted to explore new places! But in the end went to queenstown IKEA- meatballs, chickenwings, cheesecake, apple strudel, pasta! Walked abit then impromptu decision to go buona star vista (: 
  
  Really felt comfortable with this boy, like you know, that feeling whereby even if it's just going somewhere you'd went for a million times it'll still be a new feeling because he is with you. And you just can spend hours just talking to him and enjoying his company, wishing time could just crawl slower and you just wish you can cling on to him forever. How you could just smile to yourself just thinking of him. 
  Hehehe (: <3
  37 days~
  
  
• Results for last poly sem was out, apparantly it's good news because GPA increased by 0.09. But I don't have the feeling of happiness or .. excitement? 
  
  Maybe because I know in the end I will just end up in private university instead of NTU.. ba :( 

One of the best module grades I had out of my whole RP life. 2A(S) plus 1 distinction (:

What made me cried later in the day was what melanie faci told me, the module (genomics) whereby I really find it was very difficult for me. The module whereby I really want to give up so badly but just perserve on because I do not want to retake it again.

I just can't believe what faci had said, I just cried. 
I cried sooooooo badly. The tears, were more of sadness, not tears of happiness. 
I just felt so unbelieveable of being able to achieve it. I felt that my efforts, are not wasted.
I felt so sad, but happy a the same time. 
Thank you :'))))

• Well for now, currently still no jobs calling me up for interview
  :( 
  Applied for various at SGH, KKhost, TTSH etc for lab related jobs. Hope can have a reply soon! 
  Running out of cash soooooooooooon. 

That's all for now!
X

Happy 1st month to us, pigmel (: <3 

Went to adm earlier than the time to meet bfy intending to give him a surprise but jsie failed! :( Sibei failed :( 
Nonetheless we went parkway mall for sakae tea time buffet!
The service there was not bad and their red&pink plate is limitedless! Unlike other outlets whereby only can have 1 of each (: 

So can spam the sashimi! The food is fresh too! But only ~2 rounds and we are done! 
Walk walk and nuaz around followed by dinner at soup spoonz
Although it was a simple day out, I really had fun and enjoyed myself (: (: (: 

Thanks boy, for everything and also the pretty keychain present
Each of us have one side of it heeeee! 
Love love it! 
5201314 RT (: 

Special thanks to elesis for helping me in the choco truffles for mel! Tried for 3 times to make heart shaped ones but keep failling. 
Wanted to make oreo-flavoured ones but it doesnt taste good too! 
In the end made alcohol-cocoapowder-coated truffles but boy said it tasted nice! And jackdanielwhisky-chocolates !
Thanks jie!! <3 :D 

Thats all! 
X,